how far I have come. to call the last 6 months anything but a harsh, heartbreaking struggle would not do it justice. I am nowhere near the end and still no nearer the justice I feel my children and I deserve. that fateful night of 12th June 2009 will be in my mind, my nightmares, my whole being forever. if you’d have told my story to somebody I doubt they would believe you. when you hear or read stories about other peoples lives it’s easy to shrug off the disaster visited upon them and carry on with your own life, never again giving those thirty or so words in the newspaper a thought. until it happens to you. whenever I do relate my story to people I always say “people are locked up for things they didn’t do, for a long time and once you are in prison it is harder to get people to believe you”. the police and the CPS believed me, but i often think how long would i have been on remand, never mind an actual sentance. sobering stuff.
and now……… see where I am. I have a flat of my own. I see my children every weekend and they tell me how much they want to live with me “ten days with you daddy and four at mommies”. I have people stop me in the street and tell me how they “never believed a word of it”. I even have the satisfaction of knowing that with friends like the ones she has surrounded herself with, you don’t need enemies. all the things that people say about my ex-wife behind her back, I hear. priceless. the harsh reality of total betrayal at the hands of someone I would have sacrificed my life for (cos thats what good husbands do for their families) seems a million miles away. I am proud of myself for surviving.
and now I sit, writing this blog, waiting for the time to arrive (2pm on 25th December) when I go to get my children to spend christmas together with the rest of their family. they will even meet my cousins children for the first time. I have control of my own life and all the responsibilities that go with it. I feel that part of that responsiblity is the pursuit of justice. I will never have closure until I get justice. but for now I thank god for small mercies….. and merry christmas and a happy new year, because mine will be!